Woman Slams Best Friend for Constantly Texting Her Boyfriend: ‘Making Me Uncomfortable’

A woman's relationship with her best friend has hit a rough patch because the friend won't stop texting the woman's boyfriend.

"[Jane] and my boyfriend initially started texting to plan my birthday surprise, and I thought that was the end of things. I find out one day that they’ve been texting privately without me knowing, and she would update him about stuff in her life or rant about the men in her life. I thought nothing of it at first, but it continued on," the woman began on Reddit, adding she thought it was "innocent" even if it "bugged" her.

"Fast forward a couple months and one day Jane asked me if I can call her because she wants to rant about a new man. I said I was busy and I’ll be calling later. Twenty minutes later when I text my boyfriend, he tells me to give him a few seconds as Jane is updating him. They were both on a call together without me there. I had assumed that Jane was asking ME to call, and that since I excused myself, no call would actually happen," she continued.

Jane has been constantly texting her boyfriend, asking for "male advice and stuff like that." And even though she trusts them, she decided to set some boundaries.

"I text her a paragraph, and I explain that I fully trust her, but it makes me uncomfortable and I’d like some boundaries. She said that she feels hurt and disrespected that I’d even feel that. She said that she tries her best to include me in the private conversations with my boyfriend, and that she always asks my permission or sends me screenshots after, even though that’s not the case. She never asks me, and only sends screenshots when I ask her for them," the woman recalled.

However, Jane was "dismissive," and told her that her feelings "stem from mistrust."

"I apologized for hurting her, and I told her this is not a matter of trust but simply setting boundaries. She’s now ignoring me and we haven’t texted in a while. We used to text every day. I understand I need to hold my boyfriend accountable too, because he never told me when they text," she concluded.

Users in the comments mostly sided with the woman, suggesting she talk to her boyfriend as well.

"You are her 'best friend,' not him. You asked her to respect the boundary you set, especially when they are hiding the fact that they communicate with each other. Yeah, there’s nothing wrong with boy/girl friendships but they are the ones making it seem weird. The fact that she feels ‘hurt’ that you don’t ‘trust’ her... She is purposefully talking/texting YOUR boyfriend basically behind your back. Shut it down. Talk to your boyfriend and ask him not to text/call your best friend anymore," one person wrote.

"It's weird, even if it is supposedly platonic. I can't understand why someone would continue to text a best mate's partner and divulge personal secrets. And why didn't he cut it off? Go with your gut. If something feels wrong, it usually is. Don't ignore it," another wrote.

"Talk to your boyfriend, not her. Have a talk with him about your relationship boundaries and expectations," someone else advised.