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This Fork Knows How to Party

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I was given this fork today from Swenson’s. They have THE BEST chef salad on the planet. The best part is, they have actual Italian dressing. I can’t even begin to tell you how angry it makes me when I ask for Italian dressing somewhere and they reply, “We have vinaigrette”, as if that’s the same thing. Back in the day every restaurant on the planet just carried Italian, no questions asked. Now for some reason 70% replaced it with butt tasting vinaigrette because the name sounds more authentic and fancy.

I’m getting off topic aren’t i?

Back to the “platter” at hand. . . anyone? get it? because it’s a fork and they go with platters? Never mind.

I’m pretty sure this fork goes hard in the paint. I’m pretty sure if this fork and I were at a party, I would pass out before it and it would end up drawing a penis on my face in permanent marker.

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