Welp, that's ruined now. Toilet paper touching the bathroom floor is the equivalent of your boy hitting on your girl. Neither one of them are going to get close enough to me to be crappy again. I can't imagine a scenario where I could justify using bathroom ground touched toiled paper. Even if someone was holding a gun to my mom's head and said, "Yo gon poop today...in a public restroom...but before you use the toilet paper you have to drop it on the ground then use it", I'd still have questions.

For example: Why is it so important to you that I use toilet paper that has touched the ground that you would hold a gun to my mom's head? That seems like a very strange and uniquely specific set of needs and/or life goals.

Are you going to watch me poop? Because I feel like that would just be weird for all 3 of us, assuming that you also require my mom to witness said poop.

Can we at least not go to a convenience store for this poop? I feel like if you're gonna make me do something this ridiculous I should at least get to choose where said poop occurs.

...I'm derailing. The point I guess I'm trying to make is, I don't care to use toilet paper that's touched the ground. That's a thing you know now. It will in no way enhance your life or better you as a person. I've basically just taken several minutes of your life away. You're welcome. Have a great Back in the Day Friday.

Sincerely,

Brizzown.